Fall Fun

My husband and I felt God calling us away from celebrating Halloween a few years ago. We still participate in trunk or treat at church and we usually go to Chuck E Cheese or do some other fun thing on Halloween night. Some people say that we are still celebrating Halloween but in a different way. While it might seem that way, I don't believe that we can just pretend that Halloween doesn't exist. I do think it is a safe and fun alternative. And the only way we have been able to avoid most of the evil aspects of the holiday that we want to avoid. We do not condone celebrating evil like it is something good, even if it is only one day a year. I have to admit, though, that this year I have really struggled with wanting to take my kids trick or treating. Maybe it is because I know how much fun Declan would have. Maybe it is because I am craving candy. Or maybe it is because I am feeling left out. My sisters and their kids have so much fun together on Halloween. Or maybe Satan is trying to make it seem acceptable. Whatever the reason, we still won't be celebrating. However, Gabe has a rocking good costume for Trunk or Treat!

Declan is a cute little puppy!

Storms

I will praise you through this storm. I will lift my hands. You are who you are, no matter where I am......

For today, I am making a conscience choice to live thankfully. Even though there are so many storms in our life right now, we also have much to be thankful for. If I concentrate on my trials I will be overwhelmed with fear and hopelessness. Instead, for today, I am going to thank God for each breath and for each blessing, no matter who small it may seem.

Circus Act

I think my thirteen year old is trying to start his own personal circus. He taught himself to yo yo then to juggle. Now he purchased a unicycle. I know that God has given him these gifts to bless people. I can't wait to see it time and time again. (And please pray for no broken bones as he learns how to ride this thing.)

My Littlest Pumpkin

Beautiful

My favorite time of year is Spring but for a brief few weeks I love this time of year. It is so breathtaking to drive and see how God painted the world with all of the beautiful colors in the trees. You can't tell in this photo, but this tree in our front year has green, red, yellow, and orange leaves at the same time. So beautiful.

The leaves have spots on them, though. Gabe says it looks like a bunch of cheetahs when you look up into the tree.

Praising Through the Disappointment

After thirteen months of unemployment, my husband finally has a job offer. I would love to be able to report that I am jumping for joy. But that would be a lie. You see, this is a minimum wage job doing something that he does not enjoy at all, working on cars. It is not going to pay enough to pay our current bills much less catch up on our old ones. In fact, if he was receiving unemployment benefits, he would get more than this job will pay. But he isn't getting unemployment. And I lost my income, too. So, I am grateful for the job. Afterall, any income is better than no income at all. It just breaks my heart to see my husband, who has so much to offer, have to settle for a job he doesn't want. I know that God has a purpose for him getting this job after withholding a job for so long. The timing was orchestrated perfectly. So, disappointed or not, I am praising God and trusting that He knows what He is doing. Keep praying for us.

NOTE: He won't "technically" be offered the job until the drug test comes back, but other than all of the heart meds, he is clean.

Giving God Room To Work

Our money issues seem to be on my mind all the time. All the time. But I have been thinking about a few things lately that have really started to change my way of thinking. First of all, our pastor mentioned in a sermon last week that we cannot praise God by simply looking at our current circumstances. We have to look at all He has done for us, for others, and also look simply at who He is. All of this time I have been trying to praise God for the small thinks he is doing for us in this time of financial hardship. Thanking him for $2o here, for a small job there. But still the needs have seemed so much bigger than what God was doing. The stack of bills, the ones waiting to be paid, was so much larger than the stack of bills, the dollar kind, to use to pay them. It has been so hard to focus on God. But as Steve preached about praising God outside of our circumstances, I have been able to focus on so much more than our bills and needs. God is a good God! And He has done so very much for me and for those around me! How in the world can I doubt Him or His timing?!
The other thing that has been on my mind was a quote that a friend posted on her facebook status. She posted something like, "If money is your only problem, you have no problem at all, because God has all the resources in the world." At first, I was so consumed by my problem of money, or lack of it, that I just couldn't accept this post. But then I got to thinking about all of the resources that God has..... everything and everyone. A paycheck is not the only resource God can use to provide for his people. Just looking at the Bible, I see a vast number of resources God has used to bless and provide. All of this time, I have been feeling a little ashamed of receiving gifts from others to pay our bills and even more ashamed for being on "public assistance" (foodstamps and medical card). But God showed me through this friend's quote, that those resources are no less his than a paycheck or any other resource.
I continue to pray that I become a generous and merciful stewart. I also continue to pray that God teach me whatever he needs to teach me through this time. And I continue to pray that God reveal to us the reason for his withholding a job at this time. In the mean time, I will continue to trust and obey Him. And I will follow his leading. And I repent for not obeying God in the first place when I felt led to cancel our vacation in August. I should have canceled it immediatly and without question. Instead, I bucked, whined, complained, and felt sorry for myself. Then to make matters worse, I canceled the vacation but hung onto the cabin, changing the reservation but not canceling it. Well, God told me in a dream the other day to cancel the cabin, so I did. And you know what? It feels really good to obey and to give God room to work.

A Blast From the Past

Me with my little sisters at King's Island. I was probably 15 or 16 at the time.

Generosity

I feel so blessed by the generosity of my family and church family. I hope to be able to someday be as generous as so many have been to us as we go through this difficult time. My husband has been unemployed for a little over a year. I am technically unemployed as of this past friday. I know that there are so many millions of others that are unemployed as well. I am trying to be sympathetic to there situation, too, but I have to admit that I am struggling with it. Our situation is a little different. My husband has not received any unemployment benefits for over three months due to a complicated set of circumstances and we have no idea when or if they will begin again. And I am self employed so I cannot receive unemployment benefits. Therefore our family has absolutely zero money coming in right now. That is a very scary place to be. I am trying to see it as an opportunity to totally trust God for all of our needs. Unfortunately it is a battle for me. I am battling everyday with overwhelming fear. I ask for your prayers for provision and favor, for a job, for our bills to be caught up on and paid, and for peace and faith in this difficult time, and for a generous and giving heart. I can't wait live generously with whatever God provides.