A Sigh of Relief

Well, I don't have breast cancer. Big sigh of relief. I had a CT scan done three months ago for abdominal pain. It showed a cyst on my ovary. I went for a follow up ultrasound of my ovary last week to see if it is better or worse but the ultrasound tech found a mass on my right breast from the CTscan three months ago. I had to wait a week to get an ultrasound of my breast to determine if it is cancerous, not cancerous, or needs a biopsy. It was a long week. I am not really a worrier so much as a realist. I spend a week preparing for every possible scenario.

I went in yesterday for an ultrasound of my breast. She had to do the ultrasound twice because the photos didn't come through the first time. Then the doc came in and wanted to have a look, so they did the ultrasound a third time. Doc said she wanted to do a mammogram to get a better look, but after waiting for 20 minutes for that, they determined I couldn't have on because I am nursing. I wasn't prepared to get the results right away. I thought I would have to wait a day or two, so it was a huge relief to hear the doc say they didn't see anything on my ultrasound (PRAISE GOD!!) and I could wait 6 months for the mammogram. That should give me time to wean. Doc said it could have been a cyst that disappeared. I know that God is all powerful. It could have been anything and He healed me. I didn't even realize how emotionally involved I was in this until I was driving home. My husband called and he didn't even remember that I was having the test or what for. I was slightly disappointed in him for not keeping up with my life. This was a BIG DEAL for me and potentially for him as well. I started crying because this is the second time I have had issues with possible breast cancer. The first time was 6 years ago when I found a lump and he was so scared he wouldn't even talk about it. Of course I didn't know he was scared at the time. I thought he was just being insensitive. So this is the second time I really needed him to be there for me through this and he wasn't. The first time due to fear. This time due to busyness or carelessness-not sure which. Either way, I forgive him and love him. God was there for me. And he was generous in his mercy and grace. Thank you Lord for your healing touch.

A Lie-Sermon Tidbit

Just a tidbit from a recent sermon that made me ponder...

The truth in the hands of Satan is a lie. Satan uses the truth to distort, destroy, tear down. God's truth is meant to build up, encourage, equip, set free.

God's truth is in love.

Wow, how many times has satan used the truth to try to tear me down and make me feel rotten about myself? He seeks to destroy relationships, families, and God's truths. He rubs our sins in our face and tells us we will never be good enough. He reveals our imperfections. He wants to divide and conquer. How awesome it is to know that the victory is already ours, through Christ. The voice of truth is the voice of love. I pray that God gives me ears to hear the voice of truth and discerment to know the difference.