A Parent's Responsibility

I have posted this once before but it is good so I am posting it again.  I found this on http://surfinthespirit.com/teens/parents.html

What Exactly Are Your Parent’s Responsibilities?

Sunday, October 25th, 2009
by Pastor Art Kohl

You parents have been given these responsibilities by God:
1. Clothing
To clothe you in a Christian manner
To oversee your dress, appearance, hair, and make-up
To teach you to avoid worldliness and immodesty

2. Food & Nutrition
To feed you with nutritious meals
To not feed you unhealthy food
To teach you to avoid the world’s junk food, which leads to physical maladies and unruly behavior

3. Discipline
To discipline you with the goal of teaching you to be a decent, law-abiding citizen and Christian
To produce an atmosphere of quiet and peace in your home
To purge you of stubbornness, rebellion, and pride
To have your will be submitted to God’s will
To teach you – through education, chastisement, and work – to be a responsible, contributing human being
To teach you to control your emotions

4. Entertainment & Communication
To protect you from evil people and influences
To teach you to avoid evil communications of today (on the Internet, on TV, in movies, in chat rooms, in worldly music, on cell phones, in video games, and so on)
To approve of all reading materials, books, posters, magazines, etc.
To oversee and approve (or disapprove) of friendships and relationships

5. Privacy
To know what is in every bedroom, desk, drawer, etc., at all times.
To oversee all e-mails, computer programs, etc.
To oversee what you are watching, listening to, or talking about

6. Education
To lead you to Jesus Christ, and teach you that He can be your Saviour and Shepherd.
To educate you in the Bible before you leave the home.

The home is under the authority of the parents and they have every right and responsibility to do these things listed above. There are no perfect parents. But whether your parents show hyprocrisy or consistency, you are to obey and honor them. If you have a stepmother or stepfather, you are to be subject to them, too (see Luke 2:51).

Most children live under their parents’ authority, in their parents’ homes, for about 1/4 of their lives. God promises to bless children with long life if they will obey and honor their parents. Children and teenagers should submit to the Scriptures and the power of God in their lives. This list of responsibilities is based on my 36 years of familiarity with the Bible.

Pondering...

I came across two different thoughts from sermons recently and I wanted to get them down so I can ponder them.

First, God will give you what you give to others. If you are seeking his grace, offer grace to others. If you are seeking financial blessing, give financially to others.  If you seek help, give help.  Just as trees produce fruit of its own kind, blessings work the same way.  Don't give grace if you seek a financial blessing. Also don't say, I will give financially once I receive a financial blessing. And do not give simply to get in return.  However, expect blessing since you are God's beloved child.

I never thought of it this way but I heard it in a sermon on the way home from church last night. It makes sense but it seems like I would struggle with serving/giving to honor God versus serving/giving to receive a blessing.

And then on the way home tonight I heard James MacDonald talk about fasting. This is what he said: Fasting is taking the thing that controls you and putting it in its place.  Fasting breaks our enslavement to food (or any other things that we are a slave to). Anything that I HAVE to have is enslavement to me (dessert, coffee, facebook...) The absence of our fasting is the measure of our contentment with the absence of Christ.  (OUCH!) Fasting reveals the things that control us. Our human desires are like rivers that tend to overflow their banks. Fasting brings the river under control and forces it to flow within its proper boundaries.

I have never fasted really. I have tried fasting from food once but got dreadfully ill and ended up breaking my fast in tears for having "failed".  Since then I have tried partial fasts but was never very committed to them.  But to hear it said that my lack of fasting shows my contentment with my lack of Christ. Ouch!h. I realize that I have been way too passive in my faith.  I have settled for "just enough to get by" instead of seeking to be filled to overflowing. So, I will be rethinking my stance on fasting (or rather my lack thereof).

My Joy

I love my children. They bring me so much joy!

I Hate Exercise!

Ok, that is not totally fair. There are a few things that are quite active that I actually enjoy, such as hiking and swimming and dancing.  I don't call those things exercise, though. They are just fun.  I just don't get to do them very often (like less than once or twice a year) so they technically cannot be considered exercise anyway.  And since I have zero time to myself, no extra money for a gym membership, and I don't have a disco, pool, or hiking trails in my backyard, I just don't get that much exercise.  I can always try the old standby- exercise dvds. But I really hate exercising just for the sake checking exercise off of my mental to-do list. B O R I N G!  Not to mention the fact that I am always so sore afterwards. And I am a huge wimp. I hate pain.  Sore is definitely something I do NOT wish to be.  However, as my scale has started creeping up to a number I never thought it would go, I am forced to re evaluate my stance on exercise.  I am dusting off those old boring dvds. I am jogging in place while watching tv.  I am trying some booty lifting exercises (ok, I only tried it once just this morning and I discovered something... you know those muscles make you leave the ground when you jump? well, mine don't work anymore). And I am fidgeting as much as possible (fidgeting burns calories, you know).  Along with all of this I am considering something new and different type of exercise.  I am thinking about buying a bellydancing workout dvd.

So, let me make a list of pros and cons to try to talk myself into this.

Pro

• it looks fun and different
• it is exercise
• it is something I can do in the privacy of my own home
• it might help me embrace my most embarrassing feature (my flab.. I mean abs)
• it costs less than a gym membership
• I might learn some sexy moves that my hubby will enjoy

Con

• it is exercise
• I have teenagers (who will likely laugh while I am doing this and might even post a video of me attempting to do it on my facebook page)
• it is exercise
• I will be forced to embrace and maybe even reveal my most embarrassing feature
• it is exercise
• I do not want my hubby watching the video. I will never, ever be as sexy as the instructor and I do not want him to have that mental comparison.
• it is exercise

Did I mention that I hate to exercise?  

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Wonderful Christmastime

Merry Christmas.  I have to admit that I wasn't feeling the Christmas spirit earlier this month.  But you just can't help but getting into it when you have a four year old who gets so excited over the littlest things.  He loves this season.  He has been asking to set up the tree since Halloween.  Family traditions says we set it up the day after Thanksgiving.  I was not feeling it this year.  After cooking all day the day before, the last thing I wanted to do was to climb over all of the junk in the storage room to drag out the Christmas decorations.  And set the tree up and put the lights on myself. Everyone is willing to put on their own ornaments but no one ever wants to help with the lights. Of course this meant a trip to walmart to get more lights. It happens every year.  But the look on little man's face when he saw the tree up was priceless.
Carmen did a report for school this year about the history of Christmas and Christmas Symbols.  Let's just say that it did not help at all with getting into the Christmas spirit.  We say that Christ is the reason for the season, but that was definitely not true in the beginning.  And the meaning and history behind some of the Christmas symbols revealed to me that I need to have a "girl" talk with my daughter.  I will never see the Christmas tree or holly the same way again.
Anyway, I decided not to stress with Christmas cards this year. And I did very limited baking (tight budget this year).  A wise decision for a more relaxing season.  Shopping was quick and mostly painless, with the exception of a banking error that led to an overdraft fee or two, but all is good now.  Today is Christmas eve.  The boys will go on their annual Christmas Eve target shooting thing (yep, we must be rednecks) and then we will venture over to grandma's house for the evening. I am really looking forward to giving the kids their gifts tomorrow. We typically only get them one gift each. We started that tradition a few years ago after J lost his job and we didn't have a choice, but we have enjoyed taking the focus off of buying and putting it more on the reason for the season so we never went back to a sack full of gifts like we used to give each of them.  They do give each other something from the heart as well, so they are actually getting more than one thing.  After spending a few days at gift wrap outreach I am amazed at the amount of money people spend on Christmas.  I am not opposed to giving. I just don't think you should have to take out a loan to do it.
Several families close to us are celebrating this year under a cloud of loss.  I have never lost anyone that close to me so I can't imagine how hard it must be to go through the holiday missing your loved one.  I pray for peace and comfort for those families.  Blessings to all of you this Christmas.

I love my kids

They are awesome and fun and creative and generous and caring and talented and helpful and thoughtful and giving and intelligent....

and amazing.

Humble Pie

Sometimes my children teach me the hardest lessons, even when they aren't even trying. Yesterday I took a group of six children to McDonalds to burn off some energy at the playplace. It had been raining all day and my house is just too small for all nine children/teens to be active. So I left baby and teenagers at home and decided to use our halloween coupons for a snack and utilize their indoor playground. We had been there for a while when a grandmother and her two grandsons came in. She and I, along with an older woman who works at McDonalds started talking about rude children and the lack of manners taught in today's society. I had mentions how strict I am and how I expect my children to be polite and respectful. They talked about how children were raised "in their day". I was feeling kind of prideful at this point. Afterall, I was there with six children who were behaving wonderfully. Not to mention the fact that I felt like I gained the respect of these older women for being a "good mother" in a generation where manners are not often taught to children. And that was the exact moment when one of my children kicked me right off of my little pedestal. My 11 year old and his friend were getting a little rambunctious and my 11 year old ended up standing on a table to try to reach the net above him. I yelled at him to get down which he did immediately. While giving myself another pat on the back for my son's quick obedience, I asked him to come to me so I could talk to him. He looked right at me and said...... "NO!" For a brief moment you could have heard a pin drop in that place with the exception of a dad (who had been listening the whole time) as he let out a gasp. So much for my mommy of the year award. I have to mention at this point that I am not usually embarrassed by my children's behavior. I have three children with high functioning autism so I have learned over the years not to let their behavior affect me. But this time I was thoroughly embarrassed. I sent the offender to wait in the van. While I packed up the other children, I was shocked at how embarrassed I was. I even considered making excuses. Afterall, the offender is one of my autism spectrum children. But I know that there was no excuse for my pride. I was wrong to feel so prideful about my mothering abilities. And that was the root of my embarrassment. Pride. After an hour long meltdown at home (a typical autism response) the offender was grounded to his room for the night for being defiant. And I was reminded that my children are imperfect. And so am I.