Fixed, Sorta

Well, we can use the toilet and tub again. And J. didn't have to tear up the bathroom floor like he first thought he would. Yeah! I still think there is more work to be done eventually but at least we can use the bathroom again. The kitchen sink is still stopped up, but I won't be complaining about that anymore. It seems so little compared to having a stopped up toilet, tub, AND kitchen sink.

Not a Good Thing

So, it can't be a good thing when I flush the toilet and some nasty crap comes up out of the tub drain. And of course, my plumber husband isn't home. Somehow I get the feeling this isn't going to be an easy or a cheap fix.

Bifocals Suck

At least they are cute.....



These things give me a headache and make me horribly nauseous! I probably won't be wearing them too often. The eye doc said to give it a few days and if I couldn't adjust to them to let them know. The reading part is actually a sticker like thing. I am hoping they can peel that off so I can just use them for distance. I can always get some reading glasses at the pharmacy.

Feeling Out of Sorts

Feeling very out of sorts this evening. As I am listening to J. describe his amazing camp experience, I am thinking more and more that I am losing who I am to who I have become... a mother. I used to be a camp counselor and program director. It was fun. Very fun. I used to be a girl scout leader. I used to participate. I used to be fun, adventurous, and outgoing. Now I am the one who stays home with the kids so everyone else can go have an adventure. The sad thing is, it has become who I am. I am the mom, the responsible one, the one who does what needs done. And I am so used to it, that I had to look at old photos to remember who I used to be. I have accepted being nothing more than a bench warmer, someone who watches from a distance but never gets to participate. Someone who hears all about the adventure second hand. Iwant an adventure too. I love my kids, but sometimes I am so tired of being the one left behind.


I am also feeling like I don't actually fit in anywhere. I have friends from church but lately I have felt like I just don't fit in with them. I am different. And I think they sense that. It seems that I don't get invited places anymore. I have my sisters but they aren't very much like me either. I guess I am feeling left out and lonely. I know this is totally irrational and untrue, but that is how I am feeling. I don't have any close friends. Maybe there is something wrong with me. I really don't know how to be a good friend and I have trouble in social situations. I am more like Carmen than she realizes. Who knows, maybe I also have Asperger's Syndrome. That would explain alot.

Basically you can say I am just feeling sorry for myself today.

Happy Birthday Gabe!

Happy 9th Birthday, Gabe! You are such a gift to our family. That is why your middle name is Makiwa. It means gift. I have loved watching grow and become your own person. You have a very unique and creative personality. You are fun to be with and you make me smile. I love you so much!

Prayers Needed

For anyone who reads this, I am asking for prayer for me against fear of our financial situation. As our bank account drains I am struggling with more and more fear. This tells me that I haven't really been trusting God but rather my bank account this whole time. I am trying to turn this all over to Jehoveh-Jireh, God Who Provides, but it is a daily (sometimes hourly) struggle. Thanks for your prayers.

Wanted: Skinny Plumber

This is how I have been washing dishes (and doing anything with the sink) for the last several weeks. The kitchen sink will not drain at all. If water does get in it, I have to bail it out then sop it up with a towel. Remember folks, I am married to a plumber! But I can't blame him for this, though. We saved the money to rent a professional snake but it wasn't long enough to reach the clog, which is located in the one part of the pipe we didn't replace last year. J. can't fit in the crawl space to fix it, so we have to save up and hire a short, skinny plumber. Luckily we do know one. He is the one that replaced the rest of the pipe last year. Now we just have to save up enough money to hire him (not an easy thing to do with an unemployed husband). Logan could probably fix it. He is a pretty good plumber in training. But we are concerned about him being in the crawl space laying on his back and reaching up to use the saws all. If he drops it and gets hurt, we can't get to him to get him out of the crawl space. So for now, I do dishes in buckets. It is a pain in the butt and it is disgusting. But it is far better than what they did a hundred or so years ago. I am blessed.